Wednesday, 3 November 2010

The Peter Pan Diet

Guys, I am about to have a good ol' moment of self pity and lamenting. I apologise to those of you who have never seen this side of me. You have no obligation to remain my friend/followers but really and truly it's my blog and I can cry like a constipated baby if I want to.

Basically I am a whale. 

A mammoth.

I am godzilla and the food in my fridge is an unwitting Japan who can do naught but cower in the onslaught of my hungry jaws screaming 'kayaka, kayaka'

I am having a fat day. 
You know, one of those days where nothing fits right and then you decide to throw your hands in the air and just eat everything because it couldn't possibly make any difference?? [p.s. don't do this- you'll just end up feeling like a fatty and then making your shame public by writing a blog post like this one]

All those diets that tell you to eat loads of times in one day are lying. It just made me more hungry. Peter Pan had the right idea with his imaginary food and so I am officially subscribing to the 'pan diet'

From now on when I get hungry, I will imagine a turkey leg and then fix me up a big ol' plate of thin air.

It works you know.

Tinkerbell did not get that tiny waist from doing crunches I'll have you know...
Just saying...
Disclaimer: I am only having a bit of a moan. IF you have real food issues, please don't eat the air, it doesn't taste very good.


Tola said...

You are not serious!! Try the Seefood diet. See food, eat food!!

Nicola said...

I did. And now I look like a sea mammal.

Jazz said...

Lol! You are so silly!!! I have been trying to loose my last 15 pounds and you would think 15 pounds is easy but honey, I'm on the seefood diet too!

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